This is The World According to Buchs - Keepin’ it moving since 2003!
- @spreenkler - the swami says hello!
- new Gmail themes - not a fan.
- F*#K! It's snowing.
- Admittedly wrong call by officials cost me a win in fantasy football yesterday. http://tinyurl.com/5jffxl
- One of my signature dishes for dinner tonight - chicken chili verde Pic: http://gpstwit.com/fw5
- Day 3 of my 4-day weekend. I've already taken 2 more showers than I thought I would.
- Watching the game @ the palomino Location: http://gpstwit.com/fsv
- I'm done with Whole Foods. Whenever I stop there in the AM, there's 1 person working checkout and 6 people in line. Sayonara, hippies.
- Why didn't I do this sooner? http://tinyurl.com/6doj4y
- 6:45 - about 50 people in lone to vote Location: http://gpstwit.com/f8d
So What? So Let’s Dance!
So, there’s this wedding coming up later this year. Apparently, it would be a good thing if I were able to dance at this event.
As has been well documented, I am a super-genius. I’m also extremely dexterous, coordinated, and athletic. My achille’s heel, if you will, would be the dancing. I’m not so good. Neither is Judy. So we’ve enrolled in a 7-week series of dancing lessons, every Friday night. It’s really cutting into my poker-playing time, but I guess I’ll get by.
The lessons are in my old neighborhood, Bay View, at the Beulah Briton Community Centre. There are about 15-20 couples in the class, and 1 instructor, Elaine. She’s in her late 70’s, maybe even 80’s, hard of hearing, and just plain mean.
There’s “old”, “old and crotchety”, and “just plain mean”; Elaine is the latter. Our first class, Judy and I were struggling through a waltz, when Elaine made it around the room to us. I knew she was watching, got flustered, and fudged a few steps. She immediately tugged us aside and very rudely asked, “How many steps are you taking?!”
There were a few other moments that night where I got the feeling she was ust plain mean, but nothing over the top. Our second class was an entirely different story.
We were a few minutes late to class - 5, tops. In that five minutes, we apparently learned how to do a twist. It’s not a “turn”, Judy was scolded, it’s a “twist”. Anyways, we missed it, but were expected to jump in and do it just the same.
When Elaine came around and saw that we weren’t doing our twists, Judy politely and loudly (quote: “I’m hard of hearing! If you want to ask me a question, you have to speak up!”) stated that we missed the first few minutes, and didn’t understand the steps. Elaine spent about 30 seconds explaining the move (”It’s a box, and a twist, see!!”) and threw us into it. We tried a few times, and just weren’t getting it, and Elaine was not happy. At one point, she slapped my hand, and otherwise was just generally mean.
I’ve had Bobby Knight-style coaches before. They’re a little difficult at first, but once you understand where they’re coming from, you get along swell. As I said before, Elaine is just plain mean.
Well, the rest of the class was sort of predicated on knowing the twist maneuver. So we struggled, as did half the class. Several times throughout the night, Elaine accosted us for not knowing what we were doing. And twice during the class I got so pissed off that I had to leave the room in the midst of one of her tirades.
If I would have had a Volleyball handy, I would have spiked her with it.
Comments
6 Comments
You forgot to mention that she hit me and hurt my hand and almost made me cry. Then we did the Fox Trot….
Posted May 10, 2005 at 11:16 am by Judy .
First of all, it is “adorable” that the two of you are taking dancing lessons for your wedding. However, once you see the rest of us hit the floor, you’ll realize you’re not alone in having two left feet.
I got a great piece of advice a long time ago. Never be too cool to get your groove on. Failing that, bourbon always aids the cause.
Posted May 10, 2005 at 5:29 pm by Jim .
That’s easy for a suave ladie’s man like yourself to say, Jim. I seem to recall that you were quite a hit at Dan & Jen’s wedding.
Posted May 10, 2005 at 6:18 pm by Bryan Buchs .
If I’m so suave, why are you the one getting married and I’m the one with a VIP membership at http://www.hotXXXactionpasswords.com?
Posted May 10, 2005 at 6:55 pm by Jim .
I’m just lucky.
(I can’t believe http://www.hotXXXactionpasswords.com is available!! that’s a gold mine!)
Posted May 10, 2005 at 7:03 pm by Bryan Buchs .
I think you should consider a lawsuit against your teacher. I’d sue her ass if she hit me. Isn’t that battery? You must know a lawyer.
I think your mother should call the teacher and set her straight. I’m sure Elaine doesn’t realize what a good, thoughtful, sweet, considerate person you are — even if you have two left feet. (Spoken like a loving mother … don’t you think?)
p.s. THANKS FOR MAKING LUNCH ON SUNDAY. IT WAS DELICIOUS.
Posted May 12, 2005 at 1:15 pm by Mother Hen .