The Ems Dispatch is back with a vengance!
Hermann the Malevolent had been running a well outdated version of MovableType that just decided to no longer accept comments. I tried changing configuration settings (nope), file permissions (nada), and eventually upgrading to the latest version. That worked, but MT is still dreadfully slow and a pain in the ass to work with. So, after a while I just gave it up. Backed up the DB, exported the entries, and deleted it all - then installed a fresh copy of Wordpress.
That's my good deed for the week. Now I won't feel so bad about thumping him tomorrow at Whitnall Park.